Shalom Peace in the midst of the Storm

On July 9, 2014 my world went into a crazy spin...I'm not talking about a nice "Disney Tea Cup" ride spin...but a "world off it's axis" spin!  My amazing, incredible husband, Jeff Taguchi was suddenly taken into the presence of our amazing God.  I mean...suddenly!  Many have asked me for the details but I feel they are not important.  It was unexpected and crazy sudden!  But just as fast as it happened, Daddy God came swooping in to hold me in His arms and walk beside me.

For the first week as I had to make decisions and plans that I never even imagined I'd have to make for at least 30 more years...I had an incredible strength and foundation that allowed me to function, minister and love through probably one of the greatest pains I had ever known in my life.  Then everyone left.  And I went north for a visit to see friends in Redding.  It was a week of meeting God in the midst of all that had just happened.  I had kisses from God and I started my walk through the deep pain.

One of the greatest lessons over the weeks since is that walking through something often seems more difficult than just breezing over it!  But from what I've been told...if you don't deal with it now, you'll have to walk through it later and it will be even harder!

You see I don't like feeling sad.  I don't like sorrow.  I love to laugh.  I love to feel freedom.  I love to dream!  So as I've walked these last, almost, two months I've been finding it very interesting to just walk...not need to "learn"...but just walk through it!  I always want to figure everything out.  I try and try to figure out my emotions.  But at the end of the day what I realize is some things just can't be "figured out"!

So there's this Shalom Peace (that's what I felt to call it...I know it's a bit redundant, but I felt it was a specific peace?!) that has often come to my heart in the midst of the storm!  It enters in the midst of the deepest pain.  It consumes me and even though there's still a struggle to let go of the "grief gone bad" (that's what I like to call it now!) I feel that Shalom Peace and just can't help but lift my hands to my incredible Daddy and just let Him hold me!  I'm going to press into this more and more!!  You see, He is my ONLY foundation.  He is the one that has given me these bonuses in life like relationships, experiences, opportunities!  But that's what they are...bonuses!  Expressions of a life that is full! They are not the foundation of my life...God is!